It is interesting how memories can be triggered and brought to the surface of our consciousness at times. Frequently these experiences happen when least expected, and also when a certain sense of vulnerability is present. This happened to be the case for me a few nights ago while I was attending a film screening for an Italian movie at the Hussein Cultural Centre in Amman. The film being shown, Un Ultra Mondo (in English Another World), followed a recently turned twenty-eight year old Italian man, Andrea, as he travels to Africa to visit his dying father, whom he had not seen since he was eight years old. Upon his arrival in Nairobi, Kenya, Andrea finds his father in a coma and is greeted with the news that he has a brother, the product of a marriage his father had with an African woman who had passed away a few years prior. Not long after this, Andrea’s father dies, leaving Andrea as the only next of kin to his eight year old brother. Andrea is then shocked to find out that he is the boy’s legal guardian and is legally and financially responsible for him.
As the movie continues to show Andrea and Charlie’s story being played out, it reveals the difficulties the two have bonding with one another and in coming to terms with the reality of their situation. One of the first instances in which they are able to bond and solidify their relationship is when the Land Cruiser Andrea had rented breaks down on the two of them in the middle of the savanna outside Nairobi in southern Kenya. It is nightfall when this happens, and as a result they are forced to spend the night sleeping inside the vehicle, which makes for a somewhat frightening experience for young Charlie. To help appease Charlie’s fears and unease, Andrea tells him they should pretend they are hunters and explains they will do things ‘that only hunters would do.’ Almost immediately Charlie begins to feel better and is suddenly excited at the prospect of sleeping in the vehicle in the wild. He then thinks he is ‘going to become a man’ and no longer feels paralyzed by his boyish fears.
There is another scene later in the movie that revisits this memory for Andrea and Charlie. It is once they have returned to Italy and are living in the city, but again the two of them (at Charlie’s request) sleep in their vehicle and pretend to be hunters. Despite being surrounded by only an urban jungle, they fully imagine hyenas and lions lurking about the dark surrounding their vehicle, and dare not leave its safety. It was at this precise moment in the movie when I was reminded of experiences playing with my younger sister, Emily, and her friends when she was around eight years old. Many of these memories involved playing ‘explorers’ in the pasture surrounding our farm in South Dakota, and almost always saw me emoting the role of a foreign explorer (frequently with a heavy Australian or British accent) and fully immersing myself in the ‘play’ that we were engaged in. I did this not only to make it more enjoyable for Emily and her friends, most notably Zoe, but also because it allowed me to lose myself in the moment and relive the childhood joys of imaginary play. In our time as explorers we also had to deal with potentially dangerous beasts skulking around us the same as Andrea and Charlie did.
This flood of memories brought with it several waves of emotions too, and as I sat in the theater at the Cultural Centre, the waves turned into real tears in celebration of these fond remembrances. No matter how many thousands of miles/kilometres I am from the FARM in South Dakota or my darling sister Emily, these memories bridge the gap to bring me right there. From my new home in Amman, all of those memories and the experiences they contain seem like ‘Another World’ for me, though one that is very dear and always at hand in my thoughts and heart. Just like Andrea in Un Ultra Mondo, I also have a completely new set of life circumstances I must adapt to, but this does not mean that I must leave behind these memories and certainly does not mean I should forget what it is to feel uninhibited by life’s responsibilities from time to time.
I knew I had to write about this experience as soon as I was able to, lest the intensity of it should wane and I forget to do so. In sum, this post is dedicated to Emily and the wonderful memories I have of you. Thanks for helping me remember what it is like to really be a kid and for inspiring me to be myself. I encourage all of you to find the ‘kid’ in you and to really let loose in life, get lost in the moment, and not take yourself too seriously.
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